Tag Archives: paddy n mick jokes

Paddy, Mick and the flag pole

Paddy & Mick are trying to estimate the height of a flag pole. A builder walks past & they explain their problem. He says, “That’s simple fellas, watch this.” He unbolts it, lies it flat & measures it. Paddy says to Mick, “Thick twat! We want to know the height not the fucking length!”

Paddy and Mick’s Day Off

Paddy & Mick are working on a building site.

Paddy says to Mick ‘Im gonna have the day off, I’m gonna pretend I’m mad!’

He climbs up the rafters , hangs upside down & shouts ‘I’M A LIGHTBULB! I’M A LIGHTBULB!’

Mick watches in amazement!

The Foreman shouts ‘Paddy you’re mad, go home.’

So he leaves the site.

Mick starts packing his kit up to leave as well.

‘Where the hell are you going?’ asks the Foreman.

‘I cant work in the friggin dark! ‘ says Mick.

Paddy and Mick find 3 grenades

Paddy and Mick walking through a mine field when Paddy discovers an old looking box. Upon opening the box he discovers 3 old world war 2 grnades. “Hey Mick I think we should take these to the museum and see what we can get for them”. “Good idea” says Mick. They load them carfully into the back of the car and head off for the museum. “Hey Mick I have just had a crazy thought. What if one of the grenades suddenly goes off without warning.” Mick replies..”Well then we will just say we found two”.