Tag Archives: car crash jokes

Man U fan and a Liverpool fan have a head on car crash

A Manchester United fan and a Liverpool fan were driving head on one night and their cars collide . To their amazement neither is hurt but both cars are destroyed. In celebration of their good luck they agree to put their differences aside from that moment on and the Liverpool fan goes to the boot of his car and fetches a 12 yr old bottle of whisky. He hands it to the Manc fan who exclaims, “may the Mancs and the Scousers live together forever in peace & harmony” & then gulps down half the bottle. He goes
to hand the bottle to liverpool fan who replies, “no thanks, i’ll just wait til the police get here you manc cunt”

Head on car crash on a narrow lane

Two cars crashed head-on on a narrow lane just outside a small village. One of the drivers jumped out and ran over to the other car to discover it was the captain of a rival pub cricket team.

“George, are you OK?” he asked.

“A bit groggy,” came the reply.

The first man went back to his car and returned with a hip flask of whisky.

“Here” he said to George, “take a sip of this, it’ll make you feel better.”

“Why thanks” said George, “that’s really kind of you, considering were both up to win the inter-pub cricket trophy”

He took a swig and handed the hip flask back. “Aren’t you going to have a sip?”

“What! You must be kidding,” said he first man, “the police will be here any moment.”