After a weekend full of drugs and alcohol, I turned up for work monday morning and they where taking urine samples to test for drugs and alcohol, luckily for me I found out on friday and came prepared with a urine sample from my girlfriend! She’s a saint dosn’t touch stuff so I will pass the test no questions asked! I sneeked the urine sample in and gave it to the nurse!
My boss contacts me after receiving my test results:
Good news – you passed, totally clear of drugs and alcohol.
Bad news – your six weeks pregnant and your fired!